This Terrifying 3D-Printed Nightmare Toothbrush Will Clean Your Teeth in Six Seconds

Blizzident_3d-printed-toothbrush_FullyC_002Brushing your teeth is the worst, am I right? I mean, if you follow the American Dental Association’s recommendations, you’ve got to spend at least two minutes (preferably three) twice a day brushing your stupid teeth. That’s four whole minutes.

Who’s got time for that? There’s got to be a better way.

Thanks to 3D printing, apparently there is. (And, all joking aside, our current method of tooth-cleaning is both primitive and easy for the average person to screw up.)

A new method that uses modern technology to make brushing more efficient does exist. The only problem is that it looks like something out of a horror movie, and also costs $300.

The Blizzident is a crazy-looking new toothbrush that claims to be able to clean all your teeth quicker than it takes to say, “Auugh, get that thing away from me!”

Using 3D scanning and 3D printing, it’s perfectly customized to fit your teeth. Over 400 bristles, precisely angled at 45 degrees to your gumline, blast plaque and food bits off of and out from between your teeth with barely any effort (or room for error) on your part. All you’ve got to do is bite down and grind your teeth on it, and you should have perfectly clean chompers in just six seconds.

Here’s some really interesting info about how the brushes are manufactured, from Wired UK:

The toothbrushes are 3D printed by high-precision machines using a technique called Stereolithography and are made from the same specially classified bio-compatible printing material used to create implantable medical devices.

“One reason to use this expensive 3D-printing machine/material combination is to achieve totally smooth surfaces, for perfect hygiene. Ordinary 3D printers produce rough surfaces, where dirt can hide and cannot easily be cleaned,” a company spokesperson tells

Cool idea and all, but seriously, would you put this freaky Hellraiser mouthguard inside your face?

Watch this creepy simulation featuring a spooky pair of disembodied teeth that won’t soothe your anxiety about this product even a little bit, and then tell us: would you use a Blizzident?

(via Quartz)